This past week has been very trying for me as I learn to navigate through extreme trauma triggers. The other day was my birthday, which I expected to be difficult. All ritual abuse survivors have been abused repeatedly on their birthdays, and so even if you have come to a place of freedom from physical rituals, you still have to battle through the spiritual aspect of it. Not only does the spiritual attack from astral rituals and human spirit harassment come into play, but also dealing with the emotional trauma of abuse that was perpetrated repeatedly. Even if you don’t…
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When I first became aware of spiritual attack as a new Christian, I believed that everything bad that I was experiencing was because of it. The more I learned about the spiritual realm and the inner workings of Satan’s kingdom the more I believed I was a victim of spiritual attack daily. To a point, it was true, but the more I have come through inner healing I have learned some important things about what I have perceived about spiritual attack. As a survivor of Satanic ritual abuse, I live with several trauma-related mental health disorders, such as Dissociative Identity…
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Today I realized, I actually have a good life. You may think that a strange thought for me, but I have to admit there are still many days when I struggle to continue on. Living with mental health conditions such as DID and PTSD makes life very difficult. The struggle to cope with all of the repercussions of the abuse and torture is a daily dilemma. There are days where it is very easy and others where I am basically a pile of sludge that can’t move. Yet my life with Jesus Christ has done a total 180. Before I…
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I have Dissociative Identity Disorder or DID, the same thing as Multiple Personality Disorder. I have lived with it all of my life and had no idea I had it. Many people, like me, have a dissociative disorder and live normal lives and have no idea they have one. They may struggle with many problems in life, but they rationalize all their problems away and learn to cope and deal with life on a daily basis. Dissociation is a process in where a person disconnects from themselves in order to deal with trauma. It is completely normal and anyone who…
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For most of my life I have been just trying to survive. It’s like hanging on to the backĀ of a speedboat that is cruising through the lake at 50 mph. Surviving is something that takes place of true living. You hunker down and wait for the storm to pass, except that it never really does. So you just keep hanging on as tight as you can, and hope that you make it through to the end. At some point in time I got tired of surviving. I didn’t want to just survive life anymore. I wanted to be more than…