When I was a child, I was deathly afraid of the dark. My room always seemed to be pitch black, even with a tiny little Cabbage Patch Kids night light I had for a time. When I would go to bed, I would try very hard to turn off the light without getting off of my bed. I even had a back scratcher at one point to try to hit the light switch off. Anytime I had to turn off the light before getting into bed, I would immediately run and jump onto my bed as fast as I could,…
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Things in my life lately have seem to go totally out of control. Just a few months ago things were great. I remember thinking that my life was pretty great and I had no real complications going on. I was loving the Lord and all the blessings that He had bestowed upon me. I was happy with my church and my marriage and things were just all around good. I also remember thinking that life is never all good with no bad and that at some point things were going to go south. Isn’t that the way life works though?…
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What does it mean to be a Christian? That is a question I have been pondering quite a bit. And it seems like every Christian has a different definition of what it means. Some people believe that being a Christian is about rule following and a God who is controlling. That is what I thought during my years as a non-believer. And I can see how it is easy to get caught up in thinking that being Christian is all about rules. You could easily perceive the Bible as a big book of rules. But it is not. In ancient…
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This year was my second Christmas as a Christian. As I have posted before I have always celebrated Christmas by going broke buying presents and enjoying the magic of Santa and all the other Christmas fairy tales that go with it. There are a lot of other things I love about Christmas, such as the lights and the food and the family gatherings, but the center of it all for me was lots of presents and Santa Claus. So when I became Christian I realized I had to completely change my focus on Christmas, if I was going to celebrate…
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Jesus is Savior. I think it is hard for many people to think they need a savior. It is easy to just live day-to-day and deal with our problems the best we can. We keep our heads down and just keep moving forward, one step at a time. We know that often we fail when we try to solve all of life’s problems on our own, but isn’t that just the way life is? I know I for one do not like to ask for help, and I am guessing I am not alone in this. Maybe it’s a pride…
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Who is Jesus? I did not grow up knowing who Jesus was. I vaguely remember seeing a picture of Him, a head shot. He was a white man with long hair, blue eyes, and a white robe. He looked friendly. But that meant nothing to me. Later Jesus was something that I disliked. I still had no idea who He was. He was just that guy who stood for Christianity and everything I hated about it. To me Christianity was oppressive, judgmental and controlling. Just like all religion. So Jesus became nothing more than a swear word to me. I…
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When I first felt the Holy Spirit moving me to write this blog, I was very excited. I love to write, and I have been writing since I was 13. I began with writing dark poems about my obsession with death. Then I moved into writing short stories and later began to journal as well. Then one day I just stopped. I stopped writing completely. No journaling, poetry, nothing. It was like I was a dried up well. I always felt my poetry was an expression of my inner most self – my soul. I guess it was about a…
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As I raised my two oldest sons, I taught them about the things I believe in, naturally. Things like evolution and the Big Bang Theory. That is what I learned in school and I believed it was fact. I also believed Christians stole everything from pagans and I wanted my kids to understand that as well. I didn’t want them falling into any false notions that Christmas had anything to do with Jesus or that Easter was even remotely about God. It was all taken from our ancient pagan roots. I didn’t teach my children about witch craft or magik,…
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Coming into Christianity, there is so much to learn! You have to learn about salvation and Jesus, of course. That is number one! But there is so much that goes along with all of that. Even if you took a crash course in Christianity I am pretty sure you would still have a long way to go to understanding the depth of the religion. Take the Holy Trinity for example. Is there really any Christian that truly understands that? Well maybe, but I have yet to understand the concept enough that I could explain it to someone else. For the…
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I don’t think I ever truly knew love until I accepted the love of Christ. I mean, I loved my sons the moment I held them in my arms. That was amazing. That feeling surpassed all the other feelings of love I had before then. I love my husband too. Deeply and madly. But it is not the same as the love that you receive from God. No, that love is the kind of love that brings you straight to your knees because you are in awe. You know you are not worthy of this love, yet it is being…