When I first started my journey to coming out of satanic ritual abuse, I felt desperate to find a reason why God would allow such a horrendous thing. At the time I had this blog and a YouTube channel under the same name, and I became convinced that God intended for me to use what I had gone through to help people. I had in mind that I could be like Joseph, and use what the enemy meant for harm to save people. I threw myself into growing my YouTube channel and using Facebook for networking. Soon I was being…
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When I was growing up I did not have a normal childhood. I was never taught the things that a young girl should be taught about the basics of housekeeping or self-care. I wasn’t taught to brush my teeth regularly, take care of my body, eat healthily, or how to cook or clean. These were all things I had to learn on my own, and some things I am still learning at the age of 44. I have always been so hard on myself for not being better at all of these things. I have continually held the whip to…
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Self hatred has been as much a part of my life as breathing. From the time I was very young, the seeds of doubt and despair were planted into my being. I remember feeling hopeless, lost, confused, and most of all, unloved for the majority of my life. What I didn’t realize was that these were the very seeds of self-hatred that were planted and being watered daily. All it takes is a little hopelessness to create self-hatred and self loathing. Starting at a young age, we can become vulnerable to those seeds as they grow into self-hatred. Our desire…