• All Things New

    Two years ago, in the midst of the despair in my suffering, Jesus spoke to me saying “I am making all things new”, and He gave me this verse: Behold, I am doing a new thing;     now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness     and rivers in the desert. Isaiah 43:19 I wanted to believe Him. I needed to believe Him, and I held on to that promise choosing to hope in something that looked utterly impossible. Yet as the days, weeks, and months passed by, I never saw a change…

  • Why I Blamed God For My Pain

    Pain is a terrible thing, but when you have been steeped in the mire of it for your whole life, it becomes a life force of its own. Pain has owned me, had power over me, and commanded me. It has nurtured me and taught me the foundations on which to build my life: suffering, torture, mistrust, hate, revenge, control. From the time I was very young I was under the grips of pain; it was truly all I ever knew. While all babies only want tender loving care and affection, all I received was hatred and admonishment. How can…