• new age chrisitianity

    New Age Christianity

    January 13, 2020

    When I first started going to church I was motivated by some deeper internal need to connect with a power source outside of myself. I was reluctant to call it God, but after years of searching for meaning and fulfillment in my life through various means, I had finally come to the end of my rope. At first, I felt ashamed to even be in a church, but one Sunday shortly after we began going to church, the pastor called for each of us to kneel at our sins and repent of our sins. My first thought was “this is…

  • self-sabotage

    Spiritual Attack Or Self-Sabotage

    January 6, 2020

    When I first became aware of spiritual attack as a new Christian, I believed that everything bad that I was experiencing was because of it. The more I learned about the spiritual realm and the inner workings of Satan’s kingdom the more I believed I was a victim of spiritual attack daily. To a point, it was true, but the more I have come through inner healing I have learned some important things about what I have perceived about spiritual attack. As a survivor of Satanic ritual abuse, I live with several trauma-related mental health disorders, such as Dissociative Identity…

  • Counting Every Blessing

    December 23, 2019

    Today I realized, I actually have a good life. You may think that a strange thought for me, but I have to admit there are still many days when I struggle to continue on. Living with mental health conditions such as DID and PTSD makes life very difficult. The struggle to cope with all of the repercussions of the abuse and torture is a daily dilemma. There are days where it is very easy and others where I am basically a pile of sludge that can’t move. Yet my life with Jesus Christ has done a total 180. Before I…

  • denial

    A Place For Denial

    December 16, 2019

    As I reflect on this year and what I have been through, I just have to praise the Lord. I have come a long way this year in my healing journey, to a place where I feel like I am truly being renewed. I have spent so much time this year living from a place of pain because it was easier for me to live in denial than it was to open my eyes to the truth. Not to say there is something wrong with denial, because it plays such an important role in our lives sometimes. For me, denial…

  • antichrist christmas

    The Antichrist Side Of Christmas

    December 9, 2019

    For many years I have been a huge proponent for Christmas. Even though I have known and celebrated the pagan side of Christmas and it’s counterpart Winter Solstice, I have still felt that Christmas is not inherently evil or wrong for Christians to celebrate. I have focused on the good in Christmas and tried to remove as much of the pagan rituals we incorporate as I could. That being said, I have also seen another side of Christmas that is often less talked about. The Antichrist side. I want to preface this by saying I am not against Christmas or…

  • ancestral spirits

    How Ancestral Spirits Control Future Generations

    December 2, 2019

    Growing up I made countless vows to myself to never be like my parents, specifically like my mother. I grew up in such an atmosphere of hate and shame, feeling so worthless and unloved, so when I gave birth to my first son, I vowed I would be different. And I was in many ways. Unlike my parents, I held my children as much as possible, and even utilized baby carriers when I could. I co-slept, breastfed, and stayed at home, giving my time and attention to my children. I wanted to be the very best mom, but I knew…

  • give thanks

    Give Thanks To The Lord

    November 25, 2019

    Being thankful is not a phrase we say or a thought we have each Thanksgiving; it is a heart posture. It is understanding God's mercy on us and being thankful that we are given the gift of eternal life with the Father and freedom through Christ from the bondage to hell.

  • The Condition Of Sin

    November 18, 2019

    When I first came to Christ I was very leery of the idea of sin. For me, sin was something that was used to punish me. I was often told I was a sinner, which was equated to evil, bad, terrible, and holding a one-way ticket to hell. This wasn’t used as a segway into the need for Christ and the mercy and forgiveness He died to give us, it was used as a rod of discipline to keep me in line. The only forgiveness I heard about was being forgiven by obeying the adults in charge of me, and…

  • heaven

    Heaven’s Perspective

    November 11, 2019

    When I look back on the story of my life, it can be really easy for me to get caught up in feeling like I am a victim. I have had a hard life that has been fraught with so much pain and suffering, and sometimes it honestly feels as though that is all there is for me in this world. I have had many days where I have felt absolutely defeated and hopeless, and cannot see any point to my life whatsoever. Yet isn’t that exactly what the devil would have me believe? Isn’t that what he has worked…

  • faith

    Faith To Move Mountains

    November 4, 2019

    I have written many times about having dissociative personalities and how they become loyal to the occult through Satanic ritual abuse and mind control programming, but what I haven’t talked about is the current struggles I am having that come from the repercussions of my denial. You see, as a new Christian I firmly believed that I was going to be born again of the Spirit of God, and everything that was bad or evil would be washed away. I would be clean and pure in the eyes of God, and that meant all of my occult ties would be…